I kept them for years in a file drawer. Whenever I needed renewal, I pulled them out, reread them, and filed them again. To be honest, I've misplaced them in the midst of several office moves, but I've never forgotten them. They are embedded in my mind and heart.

Thank You Note No. 1

"They" are two thank-you notes I received at different points in my ministry. The first one, a note from a church attender named Vickie, simply said, "Thank you for saying ‘I don't know' in Sunday School this week. I needed to hear you don't have to know everything to follow God."

I don't even remember the question she asked, but I do recall the scenario. I was a young pastor teaching a couples Sunday School class. Vickie was not yet a believer. She was attending the class with her husband, and she was searching for answers. Whatever her question was that day, I had no answer. I suppose I could have come up with something, but the words just came out: "I don't know."

Later that day, I worried. How could I pastor a congregation when I could not answer the questions they were asking? Maybe I didn't have enough education yet. Perhaps I had not studied well in preparing the lesson. It might have been that I had not prayed fervently before teaching.

I felt ill-equipped and unprepared ... until, that is, I received Vickie's note later that week. Her words helped me learn that always having the answer is not necessary for leading. An honest admission of ignorance can also influence others positively.

Thank You Note No. 2

The second thank-you note was the first Father's Day gift I ever received. It was from Brandon, a student I had been investing in for several months. At the time, I knew little about mentoring. I doubt I could have even offered a definition for the term.

What I did know was that I wanted to get to know Brandon. I learned from his spiritual autobiography that he was from a broken home -- not an uncommon story for his generation, even among Christians. He was quiet in class, but when he did speak, it was clear he thought deeply. My sense was that he had much to offer.

From our first breakfast in the seminary cafeteria, Brandon and I connected well. We sought to establish an "official" mentoring relationship, but our friendship developed more by simply spending time together. We talked about life, prayed for each other, held each other accountable, went camping and whitewater rafting, and traveled around the nation. Our wives grew close as well, as our families spent time together.

The note Brandon sent me that Father's Day was simple: "Thank you for being a father in my life." Accompanied by a picture of the two of us, it was just a handwritten thank-you note, but it was a powerful one. Nothing he could have sent me would have meant more. A few words really can make a difference.

This Thanksgiving season, you don't need all the answers to be a mentor. You need only to be available to someone who needs a friend. Invite someone to breakfast and see what the Lord has in store. And, do me a favor when you find a mentee: teach him or her the forgotten task of writing thank-you notes. Somebody will appreciate receiving one for years to come.

Thank God for Good Friends

Spend time praising and thanking God for Christian friends as you read these verses:

This article is courtesy of Mature Living magazine.

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Chuck Lawless is the author of Mentor: How Along-the-Way Discipleship Will Change Your Life. He is dean of graduate studies at Southeastern Seminary and serves as global theological education consultant at the International Mission Board.