This article originally appeared in Collegiate Magazine.
What's your idea of the perfect conversation? Maybe it's having someone's undivided attention as you talk about your dreams, fears, and frustrations. or it's listening to a friend talk about an issue or tough decision and then offering him/her godly wisdom and advice. It might be as simple as catching up with friends and laughing so much it hurts. whatever your ideal, you have a God-given need to connect with others on a deeper conversational level.
Are you energized when you teach? or would you rather sit back and listen? we need both types of people for the body of Christ to grow and work effectively. God made us with different gifts. Ephesians 4:11-12 says it this way: "And He personally gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, some pastors and teachers, for the training of the saints in the work of ministry, to build up of the body of Christ."
Maybe you don't feel like you're a strong-enough communicator to be a teacher or an evangelist. That's OK. You can still learn to communicate well with the people God has placed in your life.
Be real
The key to connecting with anyone is by simply being you. Be authentic. Don't put up walls and don't lead anyone to believe you're someone you're not. Want to engage in a meaningful conversation? Be vulnerable. Reveal some human weaknesses. By being real, you build trust. In a one-on-one chat, trust will get you from point A to point B quickly, leading to the start of an awesome friendship.
Listen up
What's everyone's favorite topic? Themselves. They don't need the world to revolve around them. They just need to know they matter and that people are interested in their life "stuff." So cultivate the lost art of listening. It gives someone your undivided attention and shows that you care about what they care about: essential ingredients in a great relationship.
Work the group chats
We've all been there. That awkward moment when you're in a group setting and don't know anyone. Facing your first time at a new small group or social event can definitely be uncomfortable, but don't avoid an opportunity to get to know a new face. Step out of your comfort zone and introduce yourself to someone who might feel as out of place as you. Find out what he's passionate about or what he enjoys doing in his spare time. Ask her what her major is and why she chose it. You might find common interests or new activities you'd like to explore. God grows and stretches us in group settings. That's why He established the church. Communication is a crucial element in becoming more unified as the body of Christ.