Grace for the Forgetful, Frazzled, and Finite

With my face held in my hands, I feel the tears stream down my cheeks as I mutter the words, “Jesus, I just need three more of me! I can’t complete everything that needs to be done, I keep forgetting small (yet significant) details, and I’m a frazzled mess!”

This happened after I failed to invite several close family friends to our son’s birthday party. I was so angry at myself; I mean...who forgets to do that? I guess me. I called the wives of those I’d forgotten and cried. I never meant to overlook someone; one of the worst feelings in life is feeling overlooked and forgotten, and somehow, I managed to do it for some very special people.

I couldn’t have imagined the response I received back because I knew they were hurt. It was one of grace and understanding. One response in particular was so encouraging: “Chelsey, you don’t have to be a superhero. You can are a finite person who forgets things sometimes and is given grace when you need it. I’ve had to receive grace so many times, too.” Grace becomes so much more meaningful when you’re the one receiving it. It’s the moment when you stop asking God to multiply you so that He might instead use the opportunity to multiply His grace.

It’s seeing God’s grace in the seasons when we feel stretched beyond belief (and thinking He must’ve made a mistake by not giving us a “clone me button”) that we finally understand the gift His grace is. It’s an extension of His love for us. He knew better than to give us more memory space or extra hands. Had he done that, we would depend more on ourselves and less on Him as the One who carries us. He wants us to do life with Him, not apart from Him.

In John 6:9, we see how Jesus multiplied. He took five loaves and two fish and fed 5000 people. He did the multiplying; the boy just showed up with the best he could offer. That is all Jesus asks of us. He doesn’t ask for “me” to be multiplied any more than he demanded the boy himself to be. Jesus simply takes whatever I can offer and uses it to multiply my faith as I seek Him in the seasons where there is not enough of me to go around.