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My Influences
I made my decision to remain sexually pure after continuous talks with my sister and one of my best friends. I am a cheerleader at my high school, and I am among the few who choose to be virgins. The one thing that keeps me going is thinking of my sister. She was also a cheerleader and is now 22 and has remained sexually abstinent. She is a constant encouragement to me knowing that I can stay pure.

One of my best friends lost her virginity last year; she went through a really rough time and wouldn't even tell me what it was about. It wasn't until 6 months later that she finally explained what was wrong. She and her boyfriend had broken up, and it had been really ugly. I can't begin to explain to you how much it hurt me to see a strong person like her weakened and made vulnerable through sex. She is a "recycled" virgin now, and has begun the healing process she thought would never come; it may have taken a while but she recently told me she finally feels as though she can be OK again.

These people have shown me not only is it possible to be sexually pure till marriage, but it is emotionally healthy.

Megan

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Value Your Virginity
My name is Jen, and I am a sophomore. I am a virgin and I plan to be one until the day I marry. Until I had my first boyfriend, I learned that staying sexually pure is more than simply not having sex. So many teens, even some of my Christian friends, "play with fire" and do many intimate things. There are many steps between attraction and sex. God wants me to live a chaste life, which is a tough choice. I don't like saying I want to be "abstinent" because that term is usually used to deny yourself pleasures, which makes it seem like it is a burden. Rather, I say I want to live a life of chastity and pureness. I embrace my virginity! You can lose your virginity in a second and never get it back again. It is a precious gift from God. Never compromise your values.

Jen

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Purity in Your Heart and Mind
I'm only 14, I'll be 15 in two months, but then again, Satan isn't thinking about your age when he goes out to steal, kill, and destroy. He's only thinking of how he can make you less of a threat to God's kingdom. And that's what he's tried to do to me this past year. Satan has lied to my face so many times and told me this one guy loves me, that it's OK to hug him and this and that, and I almost gave in. Then God reminded me of the promise I made to Him to stay sexually pure, not just abstinent.

I'd like everyone who has made this True Love Waits commitment to know that it is not just about abstaining from sex, it's about being sexually pure. Just because you abstain from sex doesn't mean you are sexually pure. Your purity starts from inside of you, in your heart and in your mind. As Paul encourages all believers in Philippians 4:8, "Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise." And I encourage you to do the same: to keep your heart and mind pure always.

Mel V.

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Rededicated to True Love Waits
I was raised in a very strong Christian home with high standards. My parents have always been very supportive of me and very involved in my life, but they never talked to me about being sexually pure. They took me to a True Love Waits banquet in the winter of my freshman year.

I knew that sexual purity was important, but I was never really challenged to keep the commitment until my senior year in high school. I was not close to God at the time because I was not being challenged in my faith. My boyfriend and I were together for over a year and he was not a spiritual leader. We had sex right after we got to college, even though we were not sexually pure before that time. I knew I didn't love him, but I was caught up in the moment. Shortly after we had sex, we broke up. The guilt and pain was overwhelming and I had many regrets. Even though I know I am forgiven by my Father in heaven, the pain and grief still exist.

I encourage those struggling with sexual purity everywhere to wait until marriage to completely give themselves physically and emotionally, because there IS pain involved and there IS attachment. I unfortunately had to learn the hard way. I have been there; I know what it's like to lose it all and I don't want to go back. I rededicated my True Love Waits commitment on my 18th birthday, right after that relationship ended; and this time, I really want to keep it.

I hope I can make an impact on others who are struggling with this issue. I am so glad that there is such a program designed to help youth stay sexually pure. Not only do these sins produce guilt and pain, but also they involuntarily affect others around us. It is never too late to turn back because Jesus will always accept us with open arms.

Brittany

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TLW an alternative in New Zealand
I'm Susie, a 16 year-old homeschooler/missionary kid in New Zealand. I made my TLW pledge when I was 13. My pledge card was walked across the Golden Gate Bridge. I'm really proud of the decision I made, but even more of the self-control I've had over the past 3 years. I do have a boyfriend, but I am so careful to maintain everything I've worked to achieve and withstand.

Where I live, New Zealand, abstinence is NOT a cool look. But what's depressing is how it's almost more so within the churches. Yes, there are other girls I know who are virgins, but I'm realizing more and more that virgins are less and less to come by. How sad is that?

The older I am, the more I realize that sexually involved relationships will tear you apart. It makes me more and more glad that Jamie and Patty (my youth leaders) were there to tell me that TLW provided an alternative. To anyone who would think abstinence "robs you of the fun," think about it from a different perspective--consider all the pain abstinence keeps you from!

Susie, New Zealand

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Excitement Builds Over Ring Ceremony
I've always had this idea in my head, the idea of waiting until marriage to have sex. I have thought this way since the 8th grade. I am now a junior in high school and yes, there is temptation everywhere! This Saturday I will have my True Love Waits ring ceremony. I am so excited!

There are a lot of girls (friends) who are doing this also - a few guys too. This is special to me because I'm not great at a lot of things. I don't sing, I can't play sports and I'm not the smartest person. This is something that not all girls can do (that I know).

It makes me feel good to know that I will share this experience with my future husband. I know God is there for me and I praise Him every day for the will and strength to carry on.

Asha

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Not Just the Flesh
Y0! I think that True Love Waits is great and all, but don't tell me to just leave it there. I mean it's like putting a Band-Aid on when you have cancer!! Abstinence is awesome-- don't get me wrong--but it takes giving your spiritual side too, for the Creator made us with the flesh, spirit, and soul.

So don't stop at the flesh because we all have a sinful nature. We all slip and fall. Give it all to Him-not just the flesh.

From a child of the King of kings
the Prince Josue Mayfield

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God Forgives and Restores
I am but a mere 15 years old, but boy, have I ever done some pretty wild things in those years. Most people assume that those in a Christian home won't sin sexually. I am living proof that statement is wrong. Everyone stumbles, and everyone falls. Some people just do it in different ways.

A major fault in my life was when I gave away my virginity. I know that I have been forgiven, and that all sin has been wiped away. Yet, Satan often still uses that previous mistake to bring me guilt, and make me feel unforgiven.

I can never have that special gift back. I have ruined one of the best moments in my life with my future husband. I have ruined the honeymoon night, and the trust. I live with that everyday, and it kills me to hear of those who have followed in my footsteps and made the exact same mistakes.

In my sin, a couple of months ago, I began worrying over whether or not I was pregnant. At first I was very terrified, and didn't have a clue what to do. Then the Holy Spirit moved in me, and told me to retur to God, so he can return to me (Zechariah 1:3).

Right then and there, I realized it might have been my sin that got me here, but God was going to get me out. No matter what the results were, I was going to be OK, and God was going to use it to many great things (Romans 8:28). God proved, that in my weakness, He makes me strong.

It turned out that I wasn't pregnant, and it was just one big false alarm. But God used that to make a point. True Love Waits is an excellent program. One thing you've got to do is totally give yourself up to God every morning you wake up. You have to surrender your sinful body to Him. You have to be willing to give up earthly pleasures to build up your heavenly treasures. That means you've got to live every day for Him.

You have got to be humble and realize that it is only by Him that you'll keep your promise to stay pure. I have since then recommitted my life to Christ, and have become what Rebecca St. James once called "a recycled virgin." I have promised to flee from sexual involvement until my wedding night. God has used this one sin to make a life-changing event. It brings me to me knees, in complete wonder, that such a God can love me.

God has proven that He can use the ugliest of things, to make something awesomely beautiful. He used my ugliness to bring more glory and honor to Him. God can forgive. Although it wasn't easy, I'm still learning.

Sarah

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Beware of temptation
What is true love? There are a lot of different opinions, and no one can doubt that we live in a society immersed with thoughts about the meaning of true love. It's everywhere! It's on the news. It's on MTV. It's in the halls of my school. I just can't seem to get away from it! I'm in the ninth grade and I sometimes wonder if there will ever be an answer to that question.

I have a friend that I really looked up to. He's in the eleventh grade. When I first met him, he was what some would call a Jesus freak. He talked about his relationship with God and how it totally changed the way he lived. He seemed so sincere, so unstoppable, as a believer.

But that was last year. This year he got involved in a relationship with a girl that seemed innocent enough at first. Things got serious quick. They seemed to have everything going for them. She was a Christian too. I mean, what more could you ask for? An attractive girlfriend, a strong relationship with God. I'll never forget the day that I heard the news that she was pregnant and that he left her. I don't know if they were constantly having sex, but I do know that one sexual act changed everything for him. He never comes to church anymore, perhaps because he's ashamed of his actions. And I believe his girlfriend got an abortion. So many hurt lives! So many things that they could have avoided if they had just waited. Maybe the temptation was too great. Maybe they thought that since they were Christians that they wouldn't have to worry about temptation. I know that those kind of things sneak up on me. It seems like the more you feel confident in your ability to handle sin in your life outside of God, the more you're likely to be a victim to that temptation.

I pray that I'll never make that mistake. I pray that I never become so confident in my ability to be victorious outside of God that I lose the ability to rely totally on Him. I do know this: the more I trust in God, the more He works through me, and the stronger I become when I face temptation.

Geoff

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TLW Ring Serves as Strong Reminder
Hi! My name is Melinda, and I just turned 18 years old. My church did "True Love Waits" about 5 years ago. I signed the card basically because it sounded like a good idea, and I hadn't started dating yet. When the rings came out, I decided to get one because it was a good reminder to me of the commitment I had made. Also, I thought it would be neat that I could give it to my husband on my wedding night. I've worn it every day since. I got a boyfriend about a year ago, and because I had already made the commitment and I have the ring as a reminder, it has kept us out of trouble. I never knew that abstaining from pre-marital sex would be so hard, but it is, and I'm glad that I did this program. Without it, I don't think I would have thought about the temptation or why it was wrong. I might have gone ahead and done it. But thanks to the program, I am still a virgin and I plan to be that way until I marry. I just wanted to take time and say thank you! Thanks!

In Christ's Love
Melinda

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Pregnant and Alone
Hi! My name is Jennifer! At the age of 15, I thought if I had sex with this guy that he would stay with me. I was wrong. He left me about a week later. Now I am 18. I became a Christian in 1999.

My church group went through the True Love Waits ceremony. At that time I said I would wait, from then on, but on my prom night, I didn't wait. Now I am six months pregnant and alone. The guy didn't stick around.

I have asked God to forgive me, and I know He has. Now I am honestly ready to wait until I am married. I hope this is a lesson to everyone to wait. It is well worth it.

In Jesus Christ,
Jennifer

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Australian Takes a Stand for Purity and Shares His Beliefs
I was 16 (now 19) when TLW first came down under into Australia. Though I never really struggled with sex before marriage, I still wanted to take a stand, as I have seen a lot of my friends destroy their lives by sleeping around.

Having made a stand and wearing the ring has given me many great opportunities to declare both my beliefs and my faith. It has also allowed many people to come and ask advice. Saving ourselves for marriage is not just a way of taking a stand, but a way of taking the offensive and really reaching those we care about. I am forever grateful that I have had these opportunities and that there is some support for those who want to save themselves.

Brad, Australia

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