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The 24 Hour Counselor

24 Hour Counselor Home
I Want to Meet Jesus
Topics

I no longer want to live

I was raped on a date

My friend may commit suicide
I feel terribly lonely

I hate how I look

I may have an eating disorder

I might stop drinking and drugging
I might stop smoking

I might join a gang

I'm afraid I have AIDS

I can't relate to my stepparent
I can't relate to my single parent

I get depressed often

I'm thinking about killing some people

I'm tempted to go too far on a date
I/My girlfriend may be pregnant

I've been sexually abused

Being adopted bothers me

My parents drink too much
My parents are divorcing

Someone close to me has died

I feel really guilty

I'm failing at school
My parents don’t trust me

In a world seen as hopeless and uncaring, The 24-Hour Counselor gives hurting young hearts hope - an absolutely private, absolutely reliable source of information, advice, and Christian encouragement when they need it most.

Contributing Counselors:

Pat Clendinning
Professor of Counseling
Fort Worth, TX

Wayne Grant, MD
Specialist in Adolescent Medicine
San Antonio, TX

Jan Lundy
Dallas Pastoral Counseling and Education Center
Dallas, TX

Sarah Hines Martin
Counselor in Private Practice
Smyrna, GA

Bill Pearce
Certified Adoption Investigator
Des Moines, IA

Jerry Pounds
Professor of Youth Education
New Orleans, LA

Lane Powell
Professor of Family Education
Birmingham, AL

Tony Rankin
Family Counseling
Nashville, TN

Wade Rowatt
Professor of Pastoral Care
Louisville, KY

The 24-Hour Counselor © 1999, Broadman and Holman Publishers. All rights reserved. Compiled by Richard Ross.

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Reader Comments:

I recently broke up with my boyfriend because he felt that he could no longer wait for me. He stated that he likes me but it is hard for him and he does not want to hurt me. I took that to mean that he will begin to seek someone else that can satisfy him. I am very much disappointed by this becaue I wanted this relationship. Now I have decided to just not date anymore and just enjoy being single and dedicating my time to becoming a better me. I actually feel good I am going to buy the ring (true love waits) on Monday. I already signed my card and place it in my wallet. I am ready for this new journey in my life and I am happy to know that I am not in this alone. Thank you so much because everyone around me keeps telling me that I have to have sex in order to keep and have a man. But I believe God more than man so I am committed like you all are. I know that everything will work out. I decided to be celibate and have been but now since I found out about this ministry I feel part of something big. I am glad that I am not alone. Thank you all so much. God Bless.
By: Anonymous On: 9/13/2008 8:33:53 PM  
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Anonymous: Thanks for sharing your honest comments and concerns. I would personally recommend the study LifeWay published in June 2008, "Return to the Garden" by Kay Arthur. You see each of the products under this title by visiting our online catalog: http://www.lifeway.com/link/?id=243672. There is a study leader kit, a member book, and an audio CD set. The material Kay covers here will likely answer many of your questions. We hope this study ministers to you. LifeWay staff
By: Anonymous On: 10/31/2008 8:31:11 AM  
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Dear Anonymous,

Hello, friend. First of all, I just want to take a moment to say how awesome it is that you've committed to live a life that is pure. You can be certain that God is smiling about this and thinks it's awesome, too! I committed that "True Love Waits" when I was 14 and was a virgin on my wedding night (as was my husband). It was tough sometimes, but I don't regret it for even a second. You go, girl!

The next thing that I want to tell you is that you are absolutely worthy to be loved. I pray that this fact soaks deep into your heart and stays there forever. You deserve the best that God has to offer in every area of life. And He will honor your desires for a husband as you continue to build your relationship with HIM each day. I know it would be heartbreaking if your gentleman friend decided not to wait for you. But maybe try looking at it this way: if he does, it means that even as wonderful a person he is, God has someone even better for you. Your relationship/friendship would not have been a failure because you both would have grown and learned through it. This is something that was very difficult for me to accept when I was younger. I wish that I had trusted God more back then than I did. I would have avoided a lot of heartache. I am speaking from experience that it can be very harmful to your relational development and your future marriage to have serious relationships as a teenager and college student. I made some mistakes in this area that I wish I could take back - not necessarily physical, but in the emotional and spiritual time I invested in guys during high school and early college.

Personally, I think that going out with groups of friends is the best way to get to know a guy. You can see how he acts in different situations around his friends, your friends, family, and so on. However, I would caution against spending time alone, and say to be very careful about how much time you spend talking, texting, IMing, and such. It can be really easy to give too much of your heart away too fast. I would recommend not making any commitments to a guy (not even that you will wait to be with him until a later time) until:

1. you are certain about his love for God, his character, how he would be as the leader of a family, and that you deeply love him
2. he has clearly stated his intentions (as in, he wants to be in a relationship with you to learn whether or not you should marry)
3. he has followed through in his actions (as in, he is actively preparing himself and his life for marriage)

Guys normally don't get to this point until they are a bit older.

Here are some Scriptures that you may want to memorize to help you as you pray for God to show you His way:

Psalm 37:4 "Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you your heart’s desires."
Proverbs 4:23 "Guard your heart above all else, for it is the source of life."
Proverbs 31:12 "She rewards him [her husband] with good, not evil, all the days of her life." This means that we should seek to honor our husbands all the days of our lives - even though we may not know who he is! :)

You are deeply loved, dear friend. God has only the best intentions for your life and I pray He reveals His plans for you more every day.

By: Anonymous On: 2/23/2009 3:58:20 PM  
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What resources are available to me? I am recently divorced and may consider dating again and the Lord has been speaking to me about renewing my mind in the area of sex. When I met my husband we lived together for almost 5 years before we got married (we were unequally yoked) and I overlooked the premarital sex element. The next 5 years sex was no issue because we were married. Now I'm no longer married. Most resources out there are for teenagers with the fear of getting pregnant/upsetting their parents. For me it's now about trying to live a godly way. Fortunately there's no one on the horizon, but the day may come when there is, and then what? Any help/ comment/ suggestions.
By: Anonymous On: 10/16/2008 3:09:32 PM  
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I am a 3rd year high school student and am believing on the saying that true love waits. My parents have warned me, including my sisters, that we, should not engage in a relationship until we graduate college. Yes, it is hard but we need to.

A year ago, a classmate of mine, who turned to be a Christian recently, courted me. It's been a year that he has proven his love for me. But then, I told him that it is still not the right time. I told him that if he can wait for me (until I graduate college) then we can have a relationship. If not, then it's his own choice. He has been telling me that he will wait for me & he has proven what he said.

What I am afraid of is that maybe as time goes on he will realize that I am not worthy to be loved. Maybe he will find someone who is better than me. I have so many questions and I'm afraid of losing him. This is the main reason why I am believing in the saying that true love waits. I am praying for the both of us and I know that whatever happens has a purpose.

Can he really wait for me?? It's still a long run and I'm afraid of losing him. Is it necessary for us to have a commitment not to entertain suitors?

We are certain that we love each other but it's the wrong time. We know that its the wrong time. That's why we wait for the right time. But what if something wrong will happen?

Please help me.

Thank you. God bless

By: Anonymous On: 2/23/2009 5:47:31 AM  
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