All the Write Moves

Written by Lindsey Hanes

This article is courtesy of HomeLife.

With the beginning of a new school year, regardless of age or occupation, our thoughts click into a back-to-school mentality like the snapping of a three-ring binder. We feel the sudden need to purchase new No. 2 pencils and become a bit nostalgic for our own school days.

 Remember those little check-yes-or-no notes in junior high that made your heart skip a beat? Time passed and you moved on to love letters scrawled on pizza place napkins or legal pad paper in the dating days of college. Then the early years of marriage offered messages traced on the steamy bathroom mirror. And today you … well, what do you do?

A Little Goes a Long Way
That intricately folded love note mattered in junior high because it let you know that someone was thinking about you. Years later, those little love letters still matter — a lot.

In their book The Love List, Les and Leslie Parrott explain that “every day, every week, every month, and every year, we cut long-lasting grooves or habits into our relationship. … With a little thought and a little intention, [couples] could consciously cultivate a set of specific habits known to work wonders. … Little, deliberate behaviors quietly lavish love on a marriage.”

Greta Owens, for example, wanted to let her husband, Shane, know how much she loved him during an especially stressful season. She left notes sealed in envelopes on his pillow every night for a week. “Each note consisted of one thing I appreciate about him,” she says. “I can tell he really needed that, and it made us closer.”

Ready to cut a new groove in your relationship? Take note of these ideas to let your spouse know you’re still glad you checked “yes”:

- Hide-and-seek notes. This little gesture has made a big difference for Don and Tammy Depew. “I’ll find notes in the fridge, a note written on the bathroom mirror, or a note on my pillow if I’ve been working late,” he says.

- Old-fashioned letters. Sure, you can send an e-mail to say, “I’m thinking of you,” but reading e-mails often feels like work. So send a hand-written love letter. Purchase some attractive stationery, pour your heart out, and mail it to your spouse at work.

- Define your love. Buy an inexpensive paperback dictionary, and highlight all the words that remind you of your spouse. Write notes in the margins, put a ribbon around it, and leave it on the bedside table.

- Funny valentines. Bryan Carter makes any day Valentine’s Day for his wife, Rachel. “I find them in my makeup drawer and on my computer keyboard,” she says. If you don’t have classroom valentines left from February, buy an inexpensive box online (try eBay.com). Then deliver them at unexpected times.

- Souvenir notes. Save a napkin, postcard, or program from a special date and write a note on it, sharing how much fun you had that day and how much you enjoy spending time with your spouse.

- Sticky love notes. The Post-it® note has revolutionized your office; let it revolutionize your marriage too. When Anna and Jason Miller had been married a few weeks, she wrote a little message on a sticky note and put it in his wallet. Over a year later, he still keeps it in there. The beauty of these love notes is that you can put them anywhere — on the visor in his car, in his briefcase, or even in his sock drawer.

- Picture this. Create an online photo album that your honey can look at anytime (if you don’t know how, check out sites like PictureTrail.com or Ofoto.com). Scan or download photographs and add personalized captions to celebrate some of your favorite times together. Now you can feel connected while you’re apart during the day.

- A little love book. In an attractive journal (one you buy or make), write one thought on each page — a reason you love your spouse, a quote that reminds you of her, or one favorite memory you share. When the journal is filled, give it to your spouse.
 
For a few words that can make a big difference in marriage, take a hint from 1 Thessalonians 5:11: “Encourage one another and build each other up.” Though it seems small, a little love note here and there can lavish big-time love on your marriage. And that’s the best reason to use those No. 2 pencils.
 
Lindsey Hanes is a freelance writer living in Ocala, Fla. She and her husband, Chris, keep a journal by their bed where they write love letters to each other.

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