Communicating with Kids about Drugs

Written by This article was used by permission from Phoenix House

7 Strategies to Help Kids Keep Drug-Free

Communication — both between parents and with their children — is central to drug prevention. At-home discussions about drugs and daily involvement in a child’s life are two of the most effective ways parents can convey messages of love and concern, while setting limits on what is acceptable behavior in their family.

According to parenting expert Ruth Wooden, head of the National Parenting Association and an advisor to the Office of National Drug Control Policy’s National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign, “Your discussions about drugs are one of the best overall ways to communicate your family’s values and beliefs to your children.” Ms. Wooden is also the director of Phoenix House, the nation’s largest drug treatment organization which pioneered the innovative IMPACT out-patient treatment model for teens that stresses communication between children and their parents.

Wooden adds that parents should begin talking to their children about drugs prior to adolescence to establish ground rules and set the tone about family attitudes about illicit drugs. She points out that while many parents think their seventh or eighth grader is too young to be exposed to drugs, in fact, the average age for first use of marijuana is 13. According to the Partnership for a Drug-Free America, one in 13 sixth graders has already smoked marijuana, and that number jumps to one in five by seventh grade.

“Parents have a huge influence on their children’s lives,” says Wooden. “Nurturing their children’s skills and abilities and setting clear limits are among the many ways parents can help kids steer clear of drugs.” Monitoring their children’s activities and who their friends are can help parents reduce the chance they will engage in risky behavior, she added.

Despite outward appearances and the stereotypical behavior of teenagers, America’s children care deeply about what their parents think of them. In the most recent study of teen attitudes about drug use (Partnership Attitude Tracking Study, 1999,Partnership for a Drug-Free America), teens cited their parents as one of their largest influences in their decision not to use drugs. In fact, two-thirds of young people ages 13 to 17 said that an important reason they don’t smoke marijuana or use other drugs is fear that their parents would lose respect for them and lose pride in their actions.

Wooden offers the following strategies parents can use to help keep their kids drug-free:

1. Be absolutely clear with your children that you don’t want them to use drugs or associate with others who use drugs. Don’t leave room for interpretation. Talk often — more than once or twice a year — about the dangers of drug and alcohol use.

2. Be a better listener. Ask and encourage questions. Solicit your child’s input regarding family decisions. Showing a willingness to listen will make your child feel more comfortable about opening up to you.

3. Give honest answers. Don’t make up what you don’t know. If asked whether you’ve taken drugs, let them know what’s important: that you don’t want them using drugs. Don’t be afraid to say, “I made a mistake.” It is a powerful way to communicate your values to your teenager.

4. Use TV reports, anti-drug commercials, and news or school discussions about drugs to help introduce the subject in a neutral, unforced manner. One of the best places for such a discussion is when you are in the car together, just the two of you.

5. Don’t react in a way that will cut off further discussion. If your child says things that challenge or shock you, respond with a calm discussion of why people use drugs and whether doing so is worth the risk.

6. Communicate your concerns by knowing where your child is and whom they are with, setting limits around their association with drug-using peers.

7. Do things with your child. Make sure that all your time with your child isn’t just about rules, discipline, “finish your homework,” “please mow the lawn,” and so forth. Let your child know you enjoy his company and just “hang out” together doing simple, fun things. H

For more information about helping youth avoid the threat of drugs, visit www.theantidrug.com and www.acde.org. This article was used by permission from Phoenix House.

This article is courtesy of HomeLife Magazine.